How to Prepare Your Marriage for Death

We know, could there be a more depressing way to start a newsletter?

Probably not. But, let’s face it, we are in the midst of a global pandemic, witnessing the spread of a disease that is killing thousands of people each day.

Hopefully, you won’t get coronavirus. And if you do, hopefully you won’t end up in the hospital or worse, dying.

But it might be worth using this moment, when death has been thrust into the forefront of life, as a catalyst to consider whether you and your partner are prepared for your last days together coming sooner than expected.

Tools

1. Work on your spiritual preparation.

Ancient wisdom traditions all agree on one thing: contemplating death is perhaps the best way to ensure that you are living deeply, fully in the moment, connected your deepest purpose. So it’s worth using the current state of intimacy with death as motivation for deepening and expanding your perspective. As the Ancient Roman poet Horace put it, "Believe that each day that has dawned will be your last; then you will receive each unexpected hour with gratitude."

There are all sorts of ways to do this: prayer, meditation, or reading sacred texts. But the big idea is this: becoming more aware of death's possibility brings you deeper into your marriage and life.

2. Work on your logistical preparation.

If you and your partner were to die, what would happen? Do you have a will? A trust? Do people know about these documents? Do they know where they are? Do you have a plan for what would happen to your children?

These are all important questions that are worth considering at any time, but especially during a time like this.