School is in session. All those glorious summer vacations have come to an end. The days are getting shorter.
And most companies and organizations (consciously or unconsciously) view the time from now until Thanksgiving as the last remaining productive days of 2023.
The post-Labor Day fall sprint has begun.
As this sprint begins, we think it's worth remembering one of the most essential principles of managing energy. It's an idea that comes from Jim Loehr and Tony Schwartz, the...
When we interviewed couples, we heard tragic stories of divorce, constant conflict, and affairs.
But we also heard about a milder, more insidious, force pulling most couples apart.
Think you don't have a problem with your phone? Think again.
Most research estimates that fifty percent of us admit to experiencing a full-on behavioral addiction to our phones. And while we might touch our partner lovingly several times a day, we touch our phones an average of ...
If you're reading this newsletter, chances are that (1) you've heard of the marshmallow test and (2) you've set your life up around passing it with flying colors.
The marshmallow test, of course, comes from a classic 1972 experiment conducted at Stanford University. Children were given the choice between eating one marshmallow now or getting two marshmallows if they were willing to wait for 15 minutes (all while staring at the marshmallow in front of them). ...
Have you ever had a single line of text change your life?
We have. Here’s a line that changed ours from two of our mentors Gay and Katie Hendricks:
“In all times and every way, we are getting exactly what we are committed to getting.”
Take a moment to sit with this idea.
Take a moment to let it in.
Consider the idea that, somehow, you are committed to getting all the problems and challenges you experience throughout the day.
Most of us recoil at the...
Has this ever happened to you?
You’re tired, exhausted even, and so is your partner.
In this moment, it's like someone somewhere flipped a cosmic switch, suddenly making your partner's every act excruciatingly annoying.
The words coming out of their mouth. The gross slapping sound they make when chewing food. That they never seem to take their eyes off their damn phone.
That’s when it happens. Your mind presents you with a long list of grievances. You're...
What's the one logistical decision that has the power to radically alter relationship satisfaction?
It's not whether or not you have kids.
It's not where you decide to live.
It's not whether you both work or whether one of you stays at home.
It's whether you hold joint or separate bank accounts.
In the United States, studies show that 43 percent of couples have only joint accounts, 34 percent have a mixture of joint and separate accounts, while 23 percent keep all of...
We're sorry to be the ones to bring you this news. But this is a hard truth you need to hear.
There is a vast, worldwide, conspiracy afoot against you and your partner ever going on another date night.
Your kids are in on it. They'll do just about anything to interrupt that dinner out you had planned for a Thursday night. They'll get in trouble at school. They’ll break their arm. They’ll get a stomach flu. They might even orchestrate a massive fight between siblings at the...
Just the other day, we had a moment of clarity.
Our book, The 80/80 Marriage, has now been out for almost two years. Throughout this time, we've wondered: Why do some couples who read the book report massive transformations while others report feeling hesitant, almost overwhelmed, by the idea of shifting to 80/80?
We finally uncovered the answer: the 80/80 model is radical, way more radical than we initially understood.
The goal of this framework isn't to shift from...
Has this ever happened to you?
You notice something about a friend, something they have that you wish you had.
The perfect body - I wish I looked more like that.
Effortless success at work - why is everything so hard for me?
Their annoyingly upbeat mental state - I wish I had that energy.
Or maybe you experience this with another couple you know.
They go on amazing trips – we never go on vacations like those.
Their seemingly relaxed and stress-free life – why are we...
We’ve all been there.
It’s the end of a long, hard, day. You’re exhausted. So is your partner. And, all of a sudden, everything they do becomes excruciatingly annoying: the way they chew their food, the way they cut you off in the kitchen on your way to the fridge, or that thing they said at dinner.
Avoiding conflict in these conditions is like avoiding getting soaked during a massive rain storm. Sometimes, it feels inevitable.
But what if you...